My Novel

My agent is in the midst of finding the right editor for my YA Epic Fantasy titled WHERE SHADOWS LIEThe plot:

Forced to murder his father, a part-demon prince flees home and heritage to find a new life. But when a human girl steals his heart, his demons threaten to leave her world a bloody, barren wasteland. Now, the only way to stop them is to embrace his heritage after all.

The first 250 words:

He could easily end it. Summon a demon, let it devour the Queen, and enjoy a peaceful supper without her scouring him for imperfection. The servants would probably applaud him.

Summoning a demon? No problem. Stop it from slaughtering everyone including himself, well…that might be a challenge.

“I trust gloves were worn during your preparation?”

The Prince tensed. His long, black cape pulled lightly against his shoulders as the Queen examined it. Her gentle tone was poison nectar—sweet to the ears, deadly if believed. But no matter what she tried, he wouldn’t show her anything. “Yes, Mother.”

The Prince kept his eyes forward. He usually found the dark, stone walls of his room comforting. Now they stood as ominous giants, trapping him with her.

The Queen released his cape and circled around to face him, her heels clicking against the stone floor. A few of the ten servants flinched at the noise as though her shoes were pounding hammers. The servants remained stiffly lined against the far wall, their eyes locked on the Queen as she prowled around him, inspecting his preparation. One mistake was all it took to summon her cruelty.

She stooped down, looking over his boots. “Did anyone speak to you?”

Still with that gentle tone. Did she really think he could be disarmed so easily? She had to be testing him. “Why would a commoner dare speak to me?”


The manuscript is complete at 88,000 words. If you want to know more, read this post here. Check this page to stay posted on all the news.


September 2012:  I won first place with WHERE SHADOWS LIE in the YA manuscript category for the 2012 League of Utah Writers writing contest—a statewide competition!

December 2012: I was selected to participate as a mentee in the final round of Pitch Wars.

May 2013: I took WHERE SHADOWS LIE to the LDStorymakers Conference and live-pitched an agent and she requested a full manuscript to consider.

Current: I am currently represented by Michelle Witte of Mansion Street Literary Management. After thorough revisions we are currently submitting the novel to editors to hopefully find it a publishing home!

jae scribbles

29 thoughts on “My Novel

  1. Very cool…now I must trot off (now I’m a freaking horse?) and figure out a logline for my WIP. I’ve been trying for a few weeks now…

  2. This is cool. I should probably do a page like this for my main novel- but then I might end up going off on a ‘I love this bit and that bit. You people must help me with this bit and that bit,’ tangent!
    What, do you think, makes a good logline?
    And, on a slightly different related point, how can I avoid or correct headhopping/POV problems?

    • I’m always available to help my blog buddies with loglines, so if you want feel free to slip me an email of your best shot and we’ll go from there.

      As for headhopping, I used to be notorious for omniscient view, which works great for me because the vision is already perfectly nestled in my head, but bad for my readers. The trend lately is to have multiple protagonists, but the problem is you have to go minimalist on plot, especially the larger number of protagonists you have. What I do is try to stay strictly in my main protagonist’s head. If they aren’t there to hear about it, it doesn’t make it on the page. There have been times when I’ve wanted to write scenes not involving them, and I have written a few, but I cut them and count that as backstory practice, then see how I can weave it in with the characters with the protag present. Something we have to remember is sometimes less is more. We don’t have to tell the readers everything, just enough to keep them interested in finding answers.

      You may still headhop a bit in early drafts, but that’s okay, they’re EARLY, ROUGH drafts. Editing is where you polish it up better. But if you really must headhop or change POV I’d say change chapters for the POV or change scenes so we know whose head we’re in and then stick with that person until the next chapter or scene change.

      I have cheated a little, meaning when the character is present but not conscious I’ve had conversations continue. But I should probably take a look at eliminating those scenes or see if I really need them. I don’t know, feedback from friends and fellow writers helps with those kinds of problems too. Fresh eyes are always nice.

  3. Congratulations on ‘Shade’. Finishing a novel must be wonderful … one day I’ll hopefully join the club. 😉

    I’m still wondering at the real usefulness of loglines. Yes, it’s good to be able to give at short description of your novel, but 27 words?

    • Loglines are important if you are doing contests, pitches, writer’s conferences, etc. Having it down to a succinct few words helps you pitch it to people in 30 sec or less rather than bombard them with a full synopsis from your head of your novel. You give them the short hook and let them ask questions. Anyways, it’s helped me with contests and agent one-on-ones at conferences—quite a lot. I recommend you have one on hand, you may end up needing it. If you ever need help with one, let me know.

      Finishing novels is great, it’s the polishing and sculpting it from rough diamond to shining masterpiece that’s the hard part! 😉

    • Thanks! It’s taken me some major rewrites to get this tension, but I feel like it’s finally working. And yes, the queen is definitely a predator. Glad you enjoyed it. 🙂

    • Thanks! Hopefully I’ll have good news to post in the near future. I’m just trying to get a query letter together so I can query a few agents. Query letters, while important, are my least favorite part. 😦

  4. Wow! This sounds like an awesome book! Are you going to self-publish or go with an agent? (Awkward moment, but I thought I should ask: have I missed the news that it has already been published?)

    • No, not yet published. I’m currently in the querying agents stage. Just looking to find the right one, ya know? It’s a long road, but worthwhile.

        • Thanks. 🙂 I’ve had some encouraging response from a couple agents. No guarantees obviously, but I think I’ve finally got my novel in a good place. Hopefully it won’t be long now. And thanks for the recommendation (or not recommendation, however it should be worded). 😉

    • Thanks Dean! Well, unless you have a TARDIS or DeLorean and can travel into the future, it’s not available yet. I’m querying it out and hope to have it agented in the near future. I’ll update this page when I have more news.

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