Spammers Greatest Hits: The Third

I know you’ve been waiting—oh so patiently waiting for this moment. And since I couldn’t find a movie to review that moved me, I instead headed straight into the spam box to see what new tricks I could pull out. Was I disappointed? Certainly not. For those of you new-ish to the blog, feel free to check out Spammer posts 1 & 2 for further laughs—or just for re-run sakes. And away we gooooooooooo!

SPAMMER ONE

Up first we have the illustrious Beep.iamempowered.com who definitely has some strong opinions on considered worries and side-effects.

Thanks for dropping by Beep, but I definitely don’t believe you read any part of my blog. Your favorite spam appeared to be on my blog: the easiest thing to be aware of (somehow I hope that last part is true). But thanks for reminding me about starting up my campaign to get giraffes pajamas. What do you say, my hearties? Pajamas for giraffes now? We need a catchy phrase to chant though: Hey, hey, what do you say! How ’bout some jammies for giraffes today?

I’ll keep working on it.

Spammers Greatest Hits: Part Deux

Back by popular demand, it’s Spammers Greatest Hits: Part Deux. I think I’ll make this a monthly event, as long as my spammers promise to stay creative in the way they spam me. This time we’re going to add a few more spammer comments for your viewing pleasure. (See the original greatest hits here.)

SPAMMER ONE

Our first spammer guest for this greatest hits session is SportandFitnessVideos.com. You know, if you’re going to spam me, you could at least try pretending like you’re a real person. I mean, one of my favorite spammers Davis bothered to punch in a fake name. *sigh* Anyway, here’s what Sport has to say:

Attention! Lit and Scribbles, now with no need side-effects! Your favorite spam comment appeared to be at the net the simplest factor to be aware of. I’ve been thinking about this a lot and I think what he meant to say was: “unquestionably believe that that you said.” So there you have it!

Spammers Greatest Hits

Who here on WordPress sure appreciates the spam filter? Yep, I thought so. Do you ever browse the spam folder? Call it an OCD thing, but sometimes I’ll go through and delete stuff just to have it gone. It’s like checking your voicemail just so that little icon up in the corner of your phone will go away.

I was going to select delete all, but some of these spam comments are just too good to pass up. I wonder if poor English is one of the qualifiers. (NOTE: If I were a spammer spamming sites in Spanish or Japanese, I’m sure my comments would sound similar.)

And now, may I present to you:

SPAMMER ONE

Our first spam comes from the illustrious commenter, OneMinuteHerpesCure.com. Wait, what? Seriously? Well, aside from offering anyone a herpes cure in one minute (um…) One had a lot of nice things to say. Don’t they all?

I kind of want to use that phrase “if you usually don’t mind” just to see what reactions it gets from people. It’s not technically wrong, just a weird way to phrase it. I actually do want to eat your hamburger if you usually don’t mind.