Spammers Greatest Hits: Part Deux

spam jae scribblesBack by popular demand, it’s Spammers Greatest Hits: Part Deux. I think I’ll make this a monthly event, as long as my spammers promise to stay creative in the way they spam me. This time we’re going to add a few more spammer comments for your viewing pleasure. (See the original greatest hits here.)


Our first spammer guest for this greatest hits session is You know, if you’re going to spam me, you could at least try pretending like you’re a real person. I mean, one of my favorite spammers Davis bothered to punch in a fake name. *sigh* Anyway, here’s what Sport has to say:

jae scribbles spam

Attention! Lit and Scribbles, now with no need side-effects! Your favorite spam comment appeared to be at the net the simplest factor to be aware of. I’ve been thinking about this a lot and I think what he meant to say was: “unquestionably believe that that you said.” So there you have it!

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Spammers Greatest Hits

Who here on WordPress sure appreciates the spam filter? Yep, I thought so. Do you ever browse the spam folder? Call it an OCD thing, but sometimes I’ll go through and delete stuff just to have it gone. It’s like checking your voicemail just so that little icon up in the corner of your phone will go away.

I was going to select delete all, but some of these spam comments are just too good to pass up. I wonder if poor English is one of the qualifiers. (NOTE: If I were a spammer spamming sites in Spanish or Japanese, I’m sure my comments would sound similar.)

And now, may I present to you:

spam jae scribbles


Our first spam comes from the illustrious commenter, Wait, what? Seriously? Well, aside from offering anyone a herpes cure in one minute (um…) One had a lot of nice things to say. Don’t they all?

spam comments

I kind of want to use that phrase “if you usually don’t mind” just to see what reactions it gets from people. It’s not technically wrong, just a weird way to phrase it. I actually do want to eat your hamburger if you usually don’t mind.

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Social Marketing Your Book and Self (BKSP notes)

The first sin is social marketing is being boring.  Don’t be boring.  What I think they meant by this was don’t spam Twitter feeds pleading for people to look at your blog or book.  And don’t let an automated system do too much of the work, so that people realize it’s a robot and not you.  Finally, give them something worth following you for.

Social marketing is all about building your personal brand.  Thanks to the internet, you’re not just marketing your book, you’re also marketing yourself.  Since agents, editors and publishers alike will probably Google you, it’s best to control what’s being put out there about you on the web.  When posting on social media, post as though everyone who can read it has the power to fire you.  That may seem a little extreme, and a lot of people in the forum and on Twitter (of course we were tweeting this!) didn’t agree with it.  But as a writer you’re in a different place than the average Joe.  Average Joe can afford to rant about people and things and post crazy pictures, etc., etc., etc.  Average Joe isn’t trying to get a book published, and no one will probably ever Google him.

They suggested that you don’t try to master every social medium out there, but pick a couple and be really good at them.  Maybe it’s Facebook, Twittter, Linked In, blogging, etc.  Do you have a favorite author or even person that uses Twitter?  Read through their tweets and see how they interact with others.  You can do the same with agents and publishers and see how they interact with their writers.  This also goes for Facebook, blogs, etc.

Be personable not personal.  What does that mean?  Don’t rant about how much you hate your co-workers, or give TMI about the situation with your boyfriend, etc.  Think about what you’d like to read in a blog and the things you wouldn’t–then don’t write about the wouldn’t.  It’s all about controlling your online image.  While you’re Googling yourself, Google images too.  Are they the images you want yourself to be seen by?

Whatever stage you’re in with your writing career, have a place ready for potential fans to go.  Give them the kind of connection that makes them fans.  Know when others are having a conversation about you.  If someone says they like your book, say thank you!  But, remember someone out there will always hate you no matter what you do.  Repeat in your head the words “grace & dignity.”  Don’t respond to haters in an ugly way.  It reflects worse on you than them.  In most cases it’s probably best to be aware, but ignore.

Understand who your audience is for your book.  With social tools, especially Twitter, it’s not about building followers, it’s about building relationships.  But, social media should never take precedence over your writing.  Don’t get so involved in the promoting that you don’t make time for what you’re promoting in the first place.  You’re on the web for a reason.  If you need help controlling time-wasting on the web, they recommended 3 tools that shut down the parts of the internet that waste time:

You can follow these social media gurus on Twitter: Colleen Lindsay headed the panel with Dan Blank and Lauren Cerand.  They also recommended following a social media blogger named Cat Rambo.

I asked what hashtags they recommended for YA on Twitter.  They said #amwriting, #YAlitchat, and #fridayreads.